My Soul

If my soul had a physical form, it would totally look like this:

If you run into something that looks like this after you're dead, be polite and tell me "hi".

A Proposed Renaming

This is a vanity:

It is well-named, because it is at a vanity that one usually expresses the sin of vanity.  But, I believe the English language is lacking much by not using more sins to name things.  And so, I propose the following things be renamed:

Henceforth, this shall be called a gluttony:

This shall be called a sloth:

This shall be called a lust

And this shall be called a wrath

Sometimes (Only Sometimes) I'm Random

Natalie and I text frequently, and sometimes I get the urge to be different.  Natalie's message is in yellow, and my response is in blue.

If I Were to Get a Tattoo

Okay, normally, I don't like the idea of tattoos. First and foremost, they're frowned upon by my religion, and secondly, I really don't have the body to pull one off.  I happen to lack muscle and tan-ness, and other such manly things.

Pictured: a person who could clearly take me in a fight

However, those things aside, there is a reason why I would consider getting a tattoo.  It's not a manly reason, and its definitely not a cool reason, but it is a pragmatic reason.  You see, I have often thought that it would be very useful if I were to tattoo my blood type, a list of medications I'm allergic to, a list of medications I'm currently taking, etc. somewhere that wouldn't be very noticeable to most people, but highly noticeable to a doctor.

If I ever were to end up in some terrible car wreck, or were to have a seizure and wind up unconscious, or were to tell my fiancé that I think she may have a gray hair, I might be somehow incapacitated and unable to explain to the doctor what had happened.

It turns out, the punishment for saying such things is a punch to the face.

The genius of this tattoo would be in its ability to quickly tell any doctor all the immediately relevant medical data.  He or she could begin pumping drugs into my body without needing to worry about whether or not this new injection would cause my brain to explode: they'd already know, thanks to the tattoo.

Considering how safe and docile a life I lead, however, the need for this medical information tattoo is relatively low.  I'm not in any extreme sports, I don't drive, I don't drink alcohol, I make sure to get plenty of sleep, and I eat healthy-ish.  I'm as fit as a boring, middle-class fiddle.

Pictured: yet another person who could clearly take me in a fight